Girl on Girl: How Pop Culture Turned a Generation of Women Against Themselves- Book Review (and Some Thoughts)

As a millennial, born in 1981, I've lived a pretty interesting life so far. When I look back at the evolution of society, the rate of change is remarkable—especially regarding the dominance of the internet. We hope that, as a people, we are moving toward more enlightened times. Yet, the past few years have shown that for every step forward, we also take steps back, particularly regarding female bodily autonomy.

Sophie Gilbert's Girl on Girl proves an insightful companion to works like Sarah Ditum’s Toxic, exploring this regression through a compelling mixture of history, culture, and feminist theory. Gilbert persuasively argues that pornography has become the defining cultural product of our times, fundamentally altering how genders perceive one another. She analyzes the profound effect of the commodification of the female body on women's self-worth, offering a crucial cultural context for the rise in self-harm and depression following the ubiquity of camera-enabled smartphones.

Gilbert, being only three years my junior, shares a familiar set of cultural touchstones. She opens the book by recalling her formative years at age 16, highlighting the era’s pop-cultural fixation on women: Britney Spears on the infamous Rolling Stone cover, the exploitative fantasy in American Beauty, and the projection of Gail Porter's image onto the Houses of Parliament for FHM. These recollections offer a raw look at the pervasive, casual sexism of the 90s and 00s. For those who did not live through it, the sheer unapologetic cruelty directed at famous women by the media is difficult to fully grasp.

Recently, I watched a few films I recalled fondly from that era, and the casual misogyny was striking. It wasn't just a case of grandfathering in the accepted "norms" of the time; it was cruelty heaped upon a baseline toxic "lad culture" that pervaded the "Cool Britannia" zeitgeist. While there seemed to be tides of change in the mid-00s, with significant progress in legal and educational arenas, the bad old times seem to be back. Post-Trump, the rise of the Manosphere, the rolling back of Roe v. Wade, and the easy access to extreme adult material online suggest the misogyny of the past has returned in a new, mutated form.

Over nine chapters, Gilbert looks at this regression of women's rights. There are a few key themes that overarch her work, most notably a "culture of contempt."

Gilbert argues that the turn of the millennium saw a shift from the rebellious punk and Riot Grrrl figures of the 80s and early 90s to more girlish, vulnerable archetypes (like the Spice Girls and Britney Spears), who were easily manipulated and mocked. This culture of contempt was driven by figures like Perez Hilton, who built careers on publicly shaming women, and the celebrity press—such as Heat magazine with its infamous 'Circle of Shame'—which attacked innocent fashion 'faux pas' and the bodies of women.

A key element underlying this shift was the rise of easily accessible internet pornography. As porn became more ubiquitous and extreme, popular culture strained to catch up, conditioning a generation of women to view themselves as both commodities and subjects worthy of derision. This era saw the rise of "Porno Chic" fashion and predation, a dynamic that eventually reached a breaking point with the #MeToo movement nearly two decades later.

Compounding all of this was the ideology of post-feminism, which falsely posited that the fight for gender equality was largely over. Women were instead steered toward finding "liberation" through consumption and self-commodification. This toxic attitude permeated all corners of pop culture—from films like American Pie to reality TV—fostering a pervasive sense that women should be objects of male desire and, crucially, objects of one another's contempt (epitomized by the media-fueled Britney vs. Christina rivalry).

Gilbert's work forces readers to confront an uncomfortable truth: this sustained devaluation of women in popular culture has likely contributed to broader societal and political outcomes. Culture shapes us and our choices, for better or worse.

Overall, Girl on Girl serves as a powerful piece of cultural criticism and a call to action. It reminds us that we must demand a popular culture that does not demean women or spread casual misogyny. We are currently stuck in a specific "Reality Tunnel"—a mental model we mistake for reality itself—where the devaluation of women is normalized. To break free from this narrative, and the "Circumambient Narratives" that define our societal values, we must actively aspire for the betterment of all women and envision a world superior to the one that has dominated since the turn of the millennium.

Britney Spears: Woman in Me- Book Review (and some thoughts)

I've read a lot biographies and autobiographies over the past 12 months, and I mean a lot! Yes, these were often of celebrities who wanted to show their best self and were not your typical lay person but it has been interesting to see how candid they were and actually critical of their own actions or inactions.

I’ve read or listened to the autobiographies of Prince Harry, Oliver Stone, Cassandra Peterson (Elvira), Tegan and Sara, Mel B, Louis Theroux, Reggie Fils-Aime, Simon Reeve, Seth Rogan and Jennette McCurdy as well as the biographies of Peter Falk (Columbo), William Blake and Robin Williams. Additionally, I’ve listened to a lot of podcasts on people including the excellent Dermot O’Leary fronted People, Just People and the perennial favourite Desert Island Discs. I’ve learned a lot from these and, even though many of these people have lived vastly different lives to mine, I found many shared the same worries, concerns and dreams we all have.

With autobiographies, the danger is that what you get is a highly polished and lacquered version of the truth; the rough edges sanded out leaving a gleaming yet lifeless end product. So, when I heard that Britney Spears had an autobiography out I was intrigued. As a teenager, Britney was everywhere in the media landscape. Even though her music wasn’t to my taste, I appreciated what she was doing for pop music. Britney was kind of unavoidable as she was constantly on the music channels or on the front of newspapers and magazines. I was in my Indie/ Britpop/ Trance phase but my younger sister was a fan so I'd often see her on her music magazines she’s buy like Smash Hits etc. B

As the years rolled on, I saw the articles and mood around her change; I’d constant see Britney smears *bows- a thank you!* in the media and tabloids at the time. I remember thinking how I was not sure I would be able to stand up to so much scrutiny and judgements about my appearance. The constant nitpicking would have destroyed my sense of self esteem as I was going through a typically awkward puberty filled with zits, greasy hair and skin, BO and growing pain issues… so how was she coping? Intrigued, I bought the audiobook and listened as Michelle Williams regaled me with the life of Britney Spears after a short preface from the author.

Firstly, I’d like to note that it is a slight book clocking in at only 288 pages so it is not an exhaustive look at every aspect of Britney’s life. It’s only a few hours in length so it is an overview of the key themes that she deems important to cover. They key points I took away from it were:

- Britney had a pretty normal upbringing but her father was an alcoholic and abusive.
- Her Aunt Jean was her favourite person in her childhood and when she died it hit her hard.
- Justin Timberlake was living with her and, when she was pregnant, they had it terminated as he stated that he was not ready. She said JT drifted apart after that and had affairs.
- Madonna offered her support and collaborated on a song.
- She is friends with Paris Hilton and the two were drinking and partying buddies but Britney insists she never did hard drugs.
- The conservatorship took away a lot of her agency and freedom. Her father stated, 'I'm Britney now'.
- Her mum went on a lot of talk shows to publicise her book where she constantly trash talked Britney, even when her sister got pregnant at 16 years old.
- The #FreeBritney really helped her mental health.
- She really looks up to Reese Witherspoon, who she believes is a powerful and strong woman, and had a fling with Colin Farrell, who she dated for a few weeks post-JT.
- Her sister Jamie-Lynn rushed out an autobio of her own to capitalise on Britney's conservatorship ending.

Throughout the book, what comes through is how angry she is that the people who should have had her back the most were the ones to let her down and betray her to ride the gravy train. It is painfully honest account of her life so far but, as with all autobiographies, versions of events are from a singular viewpoint. This is my truth isn't the same thing as this IS the truth; it can't be as there are so many perspectives and viewpoints to consider that that wouldn't be possible.

A life lived isn't empirical but messy and nuanced and so what we have is Britney’s version of events. Whether things occurred as she portrays them, we can't know, but the points she raises against the media I, and I’m sure many of you too, have seen. The constant misogyny and scrutiny about her appearance seem chilling now after the #metoo movement- the 90s and 00s seems like a whole different era but it was only a couple of decades ago.

Something I've learned over the years is Quid Pro Quo, who benefits is probably the most likely proponent of what is occurring. And so, whilst I always take autobio with a a grain of salt, the trashiness level shown by her own family and ‘friends’ to release books and go on talks how's whilst your own family member or close friend is suffering makes me believe Britney's account more than theirs. The disregard shown by her family for her mental health is stunningly awful and the fact that they held her captive for so long is an indictment against the mental health institutions and the systems that allowed it to happen.

The book is very interesting and well worth a read, even for someone like me who’s not really into this kind of thing.

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LINK- On And On And Colston ( Or, How We Kinda Sort of Learned to Talk About the Legacy of Colonialism and the British Empire)

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LINK: Let’s All Create a ‘New Normal’.